reflections....

The last few weeks and months have been hard. I keep finding myself caught up in moments of frustration, dissapointment, mixed feeling of all sorts. I keep pushing on, keeping myself busy, , kept trying to look after myself, trying not to let myself sink into a pot of self-pity...but some days are just harder than others. I feel lost, of maybe losing my identity, losing my space, losing my freedom. Of always giving so much, but not receiving much back...and I thought giving is joy? Feeling gloomy is almost an understatement, there have just been too much going on this year and I am nearly the end of my ability, of my spirit to keep giving and to keep going on....I want to rest, I want to forget about other things in life...I only want to focus on those closest to me for the moment. I am tired. I want to stop for a while. I can't do it all.

I want a simple life...with simple things...with pure essential joy to last me a lifetime! That I ask for more than anything....